When the bible warns against serving another god, I don’t usually think of myselfas someone that struggles with that. It’s not like I have a golden idol of some other god set up in my room. But I realized recently that there were some things where my most preoccupying thought didn’t have anything to do with God. It’s the guilt of yesterday, of messing up, and the pressure of tomorrow. I felt like I had to answer for the ways I had messed up or embarrassed myself, beyond apologizing and trying to make it right. I had messed up at the salon pretty bad and I couldn’t sleep that night and the one thought I couldn’t get out of my head is that The God I claim to serve, didn’t ask me to answer for those mistakes. I wrote this:
Tomorrow is a cruel taskmaster. He is demanding and terrifying. He is unpredictable yet desirable. You run both to him and from him at the same time. He assures you If you miss his deadline, there will be hell to pay.
Yesterday is a haunting mistress. She is there every minute you aren’t preoccupied and in the stillness she tries to convince you that she has a crippling choke-hold on who you are. She chides and shames your mistakes with a nagging urgency. She whispers that you were invisible except during your worst embarrassment.
But my God is not yesterday.
My God is not tomorrow.
I am not a devotee or disciple of the harsh and fickle twin masters.
My God is Jesus, and he is kind. He is good. And he desires wholeness of heart and spirit for all the citizens of his kingdom. He asks for all of you, because every other god is abusive. He will not stand for a piece of his beloved’s heart to belong to the careless whims of the cruel.
This is the God whom I serve, and I will not be afraid.
Psalm 56:3-4 ESV
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?
8 So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. 2 And because you belong to him, the power of the life-giving Spirit has freed you from the power of sin that leads to death.
Matthew 11:28-30 ESV
Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.
Does any of this make you think, Oh, that’s totally me?
Do you struggle more with yesterday or tomorrow?
How do you think Jesus would have us think about yesterday and tomorrow?